Rosie came in from the yard with her normally white feet and muzzle a medium sort of tan color. Rosie likes to create little dens to lay in, which is to say, Rosie likes to dig.
A conversation ensued. Do understand that this conversation is up for alternate interpretation.
Me: Hello Rosie.
Rosie: *hops and wags* I’m here! Love me! Pet me!
Me: *notices her nose and feet are dirty* You’ve been digging.

Rosie: *sits and looks innocent* No. I’m a good dog.
Me: you have dirt on your nose and feet. You can’t fool me.
Rosie: *looks away briefly then back* I’m a good dog! Love me! Pet me!
Me: a dog with a white nose and paws, and no opposable thumbs should find another vice. This one is not working very well for you.
Rosie: *wags nervously and looks at me* But I love you. I’m a good dog. I don’t mean to dig. The dirt just feels so cool and refreshing when I have a fresh hole. I love you! Really! I do!
Me: *pets her on the head and sighs* You’re a good dog.
Rosie: *turns and walks a few feet toward the family room, stops and turns to make sure I’m following her* Lets go snuggle on the couch!
Admit it people! You do it too! You talk to your dog when no one is around. Or perhaps when people are around.
I suppose it beats talking to a cat though.
Me: Get off that table. If you knock something off, I’ll make soup out of you.
Shadow: *knocks a spoon onto the floor* Yeah, right. I’m hungry.
Me: Hey, get your nose out of my food.
Shadow: *nom nom nom*
Me: Stop it. *Picks him up and place him onto the floor*
Shadow: *Jumps back onto the table* How rude. *Nom nom nom*
Me: I’m having cat chop suey for dinner tonight.
Shadow: Up yours. *nom nom nom*
Me: That’s it! Pack your bags. I’m sending you to the Moon!
Shadow: You may have the rest. Be quiet now. I’m going to take a nap. You may stroke my fur until I inform you it’s time to stop by biting you. Purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Oh, by the way, I pooped in your shoes and ripped your chair.
Me: I love you.
Shadow: *Bumps me with his head* I tolerate you. Now shut up I’m sleeping.
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